i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize