do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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