He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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