Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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