We're like a lot better than the average bears
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
