return my video game
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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