Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Randomize
