and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
