apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
