i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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