Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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