whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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