Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
