I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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