my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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