The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
