he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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