This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
