Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
why do cheetos always look like penises
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
