she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
high people should be assigned attendants
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Randomize
