she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
