I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
In America we eat man semen.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
