Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
where are you?
Hypothermia
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
