She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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