Ambien. No doubt about it.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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