I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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