In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
