You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
