I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
