She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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