This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
