lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
