I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize
