what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
