i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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