return my video game
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
you had me at cake vodka
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
