Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
