I must be too annoying 4 u.
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
