So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
