this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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