I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
