I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
