i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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