I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
