My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize