Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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