I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Randomize
