She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Randomize
