Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
