it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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